We cannot know our unconscious without the help of another person – it is by being in a relationship with another we can begin to discern its presence. Unfortunately it is all too often in our close relationships with other people that our unconscious causes us the most difficulty and distress.
In psychoanalysis and psychoanalytic psychotherapy the analyst listens carefully to what you say, at the same time paying close attention to what is being communicated unconsciously, particularly in the relationship that develops between you and the analyst. It is precisely by being in relationship with your analyst that you will discover your unconscious processes and begin to understand how your past experiences continue to adversely affect your behaviour.
Crucially, your analyst will also look out for how your character interacts with your environment (nature and nurture rather than one or the other) – and how this interaction has been facilitated or impinged upon in your past.